This is 100% true.
When I think back to the easiest time in my life, I can tell why it was easy and how my soul alignment looks. I can see easily where I made choices that took me out of alignment. It’s very interesting.
My senior year in high school, and my freshman year in college were my easy years. Granted, life hadn’t started throwing the hard decisions at me yet. But that’s why it’s so easy to see where I made aligned choices and choices that took me out of alignment. Because I was a blank slate.
My parents always supported me, but they never fixed my problems for me. They would listen, and then ask what I thought I should do. It frustrated me at the time because I really just wanted them to tell me what to do. I am now so grateful they didn’t. I do this for my kids, although I make sure to explain why I’m not fixing their problems for them. My parents were just raising me the way they had been raised.
I know now, that I need a group of exercise friends. It used to be gymnastics buddies, now it’s a yoga class. I don’t need them to “hold me accountable” I need them to just be around, to support me. Life has shown me that “tough love” people aren’t my people. Not because I need coddling, but because so many people get tough love wrong. They get their ego involved.
I realize now, that ego has always led to decisions that take me out of alignment. I dumped my high school boyfriend because my college friends made me feel embarrassed about him. My subconscious translated this to I’m not worthy of picking true friends. I deserve friends who act purely from ego. I can see how that choice tainted my decisions for a long time.
Exercise was something else I gave up during my freshman year. I convinced myself I didn’t have time. This excuse lasted for 10 years. And the universe gave me a bunch of proof that I didn’t have time for exercise…. which translated to I didn’t have time for me. I wasn’t worthy of making time for myself.
This is clearly a very simplified explanation of how I got to the subconscious conclusion that “I’m not worthy”, but trust me when I say that I have carried this belief for 25 years. It was a VERY powerful belief.
It took totally separating myself from EVERYONE (except my kids) to get to the bottom of this. It didn’t come to me that this was my subconscious belief until 2 years ago. But as soon as I recognized it things started shifting. Suddenly and drastically.
I can still see how that stain creeps back up in my life. Knowing it’s there helps, but it still causes chaos at times. Every time the chaos comes to the surface, I grab my stain stick and go to work erasing the damage.
So…. I challenge you to go back to the happiest, easiest time in your life. Where it REALLY felt like you had a sunbeam shining on you all the time. Write down what you had in your life then. Then slowly go through time and pinpoint where the sunbeam seemed to dim, and then dim more and still more. What choice did you make? How does that play out?
Next, get quiet. Meditate on that choice, ask how it was translated by your subconscious. In my case it sometimes helps to open a book randomly and see what line pops out. You can also quickly flick your Facebook or Instagram feed and see what meme pops out at you. Then see if this subconscious belief has left a stain on you that causes the chaos and dims the sunbeam.
I think you will be shocked.
If you want a reading to explain more, message me!