I have realized that overly friendly people trigger me to run more than snakes, spiders or rats. I’m like a feral cat when someone wants to make plans. I kinda want the pets… but I also want to hide under the nearest couch.
The reason this happens is that I recently did a 180 in the trajectory of my life. I realized I was 100% on the wrong path and one day I made a BIG change. It caught EVERYONE off guard. I consulted no one, I just did it. It was the best decision of my life.
What I was NOT prepared for was the dissonance in my relationships with friends. I quickly realized who my friends were and weren’t. Most made it very clear which side of my decision they were on. Those were the easy ones to let go of.
The harder relationships were the people who acted supportive, but who I could no longer tolerate. I felt guilty cutting them out or keeping them at arms length. It took me a LONG time to realize that I couldn’t tolerate them, because we weren’t in the same space vibrationally. They were supportive, which was great, but their decisions and comments were just not in alignment with me any more.
Now, when I meet people, I’m never sure if they are a test from the universe to see if I stand by my new self, or if I’m attracting them because they are part of my new path. I have realized this hesitation is ok. There is nothing wrong with taking time to get to know someone.
I have also realized that people have lost this art. They no longer have acquaintances. They feel like if they don’t spark with you immediately, then you aren’t their person.
Society is losing the deep connection. And I think this is why I’m like a feral cat when I meet people. I can’t do fake. I can’t do shallow. And I sure as hell will never allow toxic vampires in again.
So, if you are like me… it’s ok. It’s ok to take time before you spend extra time with people. It’s ok to not tell them your story. It’s not lying by omission. It’s simply preserving your authenticity until you know they deserve to see your brilliance.